Shit of a day

This morning:
Woke up pretty early considering it's my day off work. But I did have to get to school to do some research on a paper and finish off some last-minute details of the presentation I had to give this afternoon.
My housemates car wouldn't start, altho that didn't affect me.

At school:
Went to the computer labs. Did some research, that was fine. Made some last minute edits to my presentation slideshow. Turns out once it's on a CD, you can't save the changes to a PowerPoint. I don't have another CD, and I've yet to invest in a memory stick thingy. Also, I'm supposed to have a handout to, well, hand out, but none of the printers are working in the labs that don't have classes in them.

Home again:
Rushed home, this is going to be cutting it close.
My computer is being stupid, and won't even recognise that it has a CD drive, let alone let me save my edited PP. I called a friend who works at my school to see if I could borrow their memory stick. I can. Cool. Still have to print out the handout and save the new presentation. And get to class early to make sure I know how to use the projection thingy.

Back to school:
Computer labs first. I'm going to print the handout - one of the labs was going to be free now and so I should be able to find a printer that works - then see if the school computers will save my PP to CD. If not, I have to take my laptop to my friends office, save the PP, then get to class.
The printer doesn't work. I think the computer's doing something wrong, sending it to the wrong printer. I try again. No luck. I move to another lab. Nope. Ask the room in general for help. Apparantly all the printers in the universe are down. And the student email. That's just great. I manage to save my presentation, so at least I have something then I go to the InfoShop. Turns out the Internet was down earlier this morning, and Blackboard is still down. All the library computers are completely booked. Maybe I'd like to go to the public library? With fifteen minutes til my presentation, I don't think so.

To class:
So I have two PowerPoint presentations on two different disks which is a pain in the you-know-where but it's done. No handout, but arguably not my fault. Maybe I left it to the last minute, but I do only go one day a week, so not really. Oh yeah, I still don't have a partner, but I'm so over that.
I get to class, have a look at the projection thingy. I get the light to come on, but the computer seems dead. Oh well, the lecturer should be there soon, she can deal with it. Hopefully we can all go to the funeral instead of to class. I sit down and let my brain go into meltdown for about ten minutes.
The lecturer gets there. Oh some of you are here. Um yes, why wouldn't we be? We have class now. Not to mention I'm supposed to be presenting now. Oh, there's no class today. You're shitting me. There was an announcement on Blackboard. If you'll remember, it was down all morning. Incidentally, when I was back in the library at 3.30, there was an announcement that BB was back online.

So, no class.
No presentation.
And the time I've spent preparing for the presentation - which now isn't due for another two weeks - could have been spent on a different paper which is due next Friday.

I didn't know whether to laugh or cry. Or shoot someone.

Partners are a Crime

So I have to do this presentation on Wednesday. I have do it with a partner. I admit I left it a bit late. However, in my defence, my lecturer was away for a week, then we had semester break, then we didn't have class because we had a paper due (which I did finish eventually, no thanks to this blog) and therefore, where I thought I had four weeks to find out who my partner was and do some work, I actually only had one. So I emailed my lecturer to see if she'd give me my partner's email address. She did. I emailed her at said address. She failed to reply. EVER.

Now, I've prepared a 15 minute presentation. She was also supposed to have a 15 minute presentation ready, and the implication was that we wouldn't repeat or contradict each other (being that we'd been working together for a month and all).

Scenario 1:
She doesn't turn up. I present.
I get the grade I deserve.

Scenario 2:
We get to work on it together for a very short amount of time. We present. It's rough but it gets done.
The lecturer knows I emailed her but left it too late: I'm disorganised but still well prepared.

Scenario 3:
We get no time to work on it. We present. It is horrible.
The lecturer knows I emailed her but left it too late: I'm disorganised and stupid and underprepared.
The lecturer knows I emailed her but she didn't email back: She's disorganised and I'm stupid and we're underprepared.

Yep, I'm screwed.

Be careful what you wish for

A forfeit win is not a win.

God, or the Sports Fairy, or whoever is in charge of making people's lists of things to do happen, I'm still waiting.

The fridge wars

We usually have two bottles of cold water in our fridge. The rule is that if you empty one, you refill it from the tap. Simple enough you would imagine.

(1) But what about when one person is getting another person a glass of water? Do the rules change then?
(2) And how is this affected if person A was doing so without person B's knowledge or consent?
(3) What about when one person, (let's just, for arguement's sake, call them, oh I don't know, my brother) when filling up their glass, deliberately leaves the tiniest trickle in the bottle? Usually in this case, he knows it's nearly empty and doesn't go near it, while everyone else assumes it's already empty, but won't fill it up cos they know they didn't empty it. Which leads me to
(4) When someone, again my brother for simplicity, knows the bottle is nearly empty, and so switches to drink milk or something else that he normally wouldn't touch with a ten-foot pole.
And my current biggest annoyance:
(5) Bottle A is nearly empty. Everyone switches to drinking from Bottle B. The end result is two bottles with less water in them than rain in the Sahara.

Drink a bottle. Fill it up. It's not that hard.

So little time...

Things I Want To Do:

• Disneyland California / Disneyworld Florida / Disneyland Paris
• Go skydiving
• Get my motorbike license
• Go on ski holiday
• Go on a cruise ship
• Get a degree (I'm not fussy, anything will do!)
• Drink Guiness in an Irish pub in Ireland
• Win a League grand final
• Win another LR game this season
• Pass both my units this semester
• Grow my hair long enough so a shirt is not required

Already Done:

• Tiffanys NYC
• Niagara Falls
• Eiffel Tower
• English castle
• Laptop

Oh, See?

Ok, I admit it, I watch The OC. And I like it. So there. (It brings out the adult in me. Clearly.)

1. I love Seth and Summer. Ok, first Adam Brody is hilarious ("Ssh! We're being Stealth!"). And I love the Seth and Summer 'zings'. Brilliant. "The more time I spend with Zach, the less time I have to think about - God, what's his face? Built like a beanpole, curly hair, runs away like a little bitch on a sailboat leaving nothing but a note for his girlfriend who cried and cried over him till the Fourth of July when she decided she doesn't cry over bitches on boats."

Marisa annoys me. She's not that pretty. And not x-factor enough for me to believe she was the most popular girl in school. Besides that, she's a sook. All she does is whinge, whinge, whinge. "Whatever happens, Ryan facing off with Trey to avenge your honour - God, that is so, freaking, hot!" What's to complain about?
Ryan, a hottie, no arguement there. A bit too broody and Neanderthal for me though.
Sandy: Whoa, that kid is not funny.
Seth: Thank you. I know.
Sandy: He makes Ryan look funny.
Seth: He makes Marissa look funny.
Sandy: Gentiles. I love your mother more than words, but not funny. Get yourself some funnier friends.
Yep, that about sums it up.

Julie Cooper, gotta love her. Conniving bitch springs to mind, but despite that, she's an amazingly sympathetic character. "And we will get back on our feet, Marissa. And we'll be wearing expensive shoes when we do."

Recently Kirsten's been getting on my nerves. Rich, blonde, the picture-perfect "WASPy McWASP." Don't really see how all this adds up to rehab.
Kirsten: My husband is currently transporting a fugitive whom happens to be his ex-girlfriend.
Julie: Well, I will see your fugitive, former-girlfriend flame, and raise you a lesbian daughter.

I really like it that Marissa has some new friends. Chili, although some would say just a Seth Clone, is still great (and I really liked him in Raise Your Voice). Johnny, not so much, but the gf (name escaping me) seems so natural, a great contrast for the "Newport Barbies."
*Ok, I was right about Johnny, and wrong about Casey. One out of two's not bad.

So what is it about The OC that had all my campers, and now a large percentage of the country so enthralled? Maybe because they live their rich little OC life like it's normal. "You have my cell if Caleb kicks and you need help counting your cash." Maybe we like families so messed up that it's kinda hard to keep track. "Yeah, yeah. Me and Marissa? We could be related. I don’t know. I can’t even do the math. But the real kicker is … Julie Cooper: My Grandma." Maybe we just like the eye candy. "You know, Cohen - your two hands on the wheel, and the wind blowing through your hair ... you actually looked kinda hot."
I don't know but I don't have time to figure it out. Grab your Sidekick and Tivo, The OC's about to start.

PS I figured it out, it's the theme song.

Shoes are a girl's best friend

Ok, maybe that's diamonds, but shoes are something a girl buys for herself.

Now, don't be misled. I like four-inch fuck-me heels as much as the next girl. (I just don't have any photos of them. Not ones I want to publish anyway.)

My latest purchase, courtesy of Nike.com's iD site.

Customise the size, colour, and logos of your own pair of over-priced running shoes, which in my case, will never ever do any running, but, I think, look pretty bitchin'.

Oh the cleverness of me

Yep, it's official. I am a genius.

Thanks to a supreme individual effort by me, coupled with the fact I do have a paper I'm avoiding writing, my words are restored to their former glory.

Infinite patience (when avoiding certain tasks) and repeated use of the Search function has enabled me to copy and paste bit by bit until - yay - my words are back.

Party over here.

Part Two: I'm even clevererer than I thought. Turns out blogspot has a thing against the French. So some of my original posts didn't quite show up in a normal search. Genius won out in the end.

Never As Good (Do-over)

The sequel is never as good as the original.

The exceptions to this are:

Toy Story: TS2 was way better than the first one. It totally was.
The Princess Diaries: PD2: A Royal Engagement was better, but I'm not really sure why.
Mission Impossible: I don't really see any relationship between MI and MI:2 except the name of the main character. So this one doesn't count even if you happened to think the second one was better, which I'm not sure I do.
Trilogies: I'm talking Star Wars, The Godfather, you can argue all day, and die-hard fans probably would. But where there's three or more in a series, we should just agree that the SW movieses were brilliant/crap/overrated/all of the above etc.

PS if anyone knows of any other situations where the sequel was in fact better than the original, let me know.
I don't promise to agree with you.

The Easter Bunny (Do-over)

So, I was having a conversation with a friend of mine who'd been reading something or something, anyway: Apparently some parents who were Jehovah's Witnesses petitioned their kids school and made them take something out of their school newsletter about Christmas or something like that.

Our conversation ended up being a very considered discussion covering politics, religion, freedom and you know, stuff like that, which is clearly a momentus occasion, so I thought it was in need of recording.

Let me begin by saying I have nothing against Jehovah's Witnesses in general. Only when they come to my house.

Now, the place where I work is currently running an Easter raffle. One of the staff had a little rant about this, because apparantly we had a policy (at least under the old directer) that everyone has to be consulted and approve it before such an undertaking can go ahead. Now the thing is, we're not raffling off little crucifixes or statues of holy things.

We're giving away chocolate eggs (and I think a fluffy bunny).

As far as I am concerned, everyone is entitled to their own religion, beliefs, and practices (including adding a comma before the word 'and') as long as it doesn't interfere or cause harm to anyone else. Someone attending a building for for some singing and praying with a bunch of other people loses an hour of their life but no-one else is the worse for it.

It's a personal decision.

Someone coming to my house and suggesting I become one of them is on the line. If I say no and they walk away, where's the harm? Nowhere, I guess. As long as it doesn't turn into badgering. (Just don't expect a warm welcome from me, that's all) On the other hand, I don't have to be rude about it. A nice polite 'no thanks, get off my property' should do it. Goes without saying (but I'll say it anyway) killing, locking up etc someone simply because they don't share your beliefs is wrong.

But back to the newsletter thing. Christmas concerts, Easter raffles, Halloween displays at shopping centers, little cross pendants, team colours. If we take away everything that separates us an individual because it's not 'politically correct' we as individuals lose our identity, and we as a nation lose our identity.

Furthermore, you take away Christmas and Easter, and Hallmark and the postal service and Hersheys will go broke in the very near future.

Grrr... (Do-over)

Bec, Miss I'm-good-enough-to-play-but-too-good-to-come-to-practice-even-though-on-Tuesday-when-I-said-I'd-come-was-the-whole-reason-we-decided-to-have-practice thinks she's good enough to play but too good to come to practice, even though on Tuesday when she said she'd come, was the whole reason we decided to have practice this week.

Grrr.

Retail Therapy (Do-over)

A recent survey of um, me, unearthed some interesting results regarding females and shopping.

For example: A few incidental minor purchases prevent a lot of retail build-up occurring in the body. Without this necessary precaution, the build-up of excess retail molecules will ultimately burst out in the form of an untimely and expensive shopping trip.*

Kinda like my theory of car crashes - a minor ding now and then prevents the need for the bad car karma resulting in perhaps a rollover or very expensive body work.

Therefore, it has been proven that a little shopping is a very good thing.
Go to it girls!

*See laptop and trip to Europe.

How do you spell that again? (Do-over)

Parents hey. Honestly. Now I know that I'm not the first one to pick up on and/or be annoyed by this, but really, enough is enough.

Our local paper recently ran a photo segment of classes of kids attending their first day at school. Aw cute. Their names were also published. In one class of about twenty children, only two had names that were not either:

1. oddly spelt, eg Alacksandrah;
2. made up, eg Tarlisha or;
3. just strange. eg Ben. Or Emma. I mean, really.

Two kids I met a while back (siblings) had the delightful names of Jaryd and Ysobel. What, someone thought the letter Y was underused? Ok, it probably is, but can you imagine these poor kids' lives?

"Ysobel with a Y."
"Oh, um, ISOBELLY?"

"It's Jaryd with a Y."
"YARED? Shouldn't that be pronounced Yared?"

Not to mention all the concocted names they're coming out with these days. The number of Kalishias and Tanissijahs and Aaliyahs who will go through their entire lives with people (probably themselves) misspelling and mispronouncing their names is just amazing.

I had the chance to read a trashy women's magazine a a few weeks ago, and never being one to pass up such an opportunity, noted that Katie Holmes objected to Tom's choice of name - something to do with the inventor of Scientology. Apparantly she "feared" there was a chance the child would be ridiculed because of its name. Well yeah. It was a bizarre name, the kid would be teased right out of its crib.

But I don't see why that would bother her. It is seriously uncool for a celeb's child to have a 'normal' name. When you live in Hollywood surrounded by Apple, Coco, Honey-Boo and Toyota-Cola, how would it look if your kid's name was, like, Jessica?

Seriously. However, I have had it pointed out to me that changing your birth name by deed poll is is really a very simple process. And I forsee a sharp rise in the number of people taking advantage of a system which allows them to reverse the horrortheir unthinking (or perhaps they thought too much, when they should have kept it simple) parents inflicted on them in the prior eighteen years.

And the crowd goes wild! (Do-over)

I'm not saying that I've been to or even seen every sporting performance or music show ever, but I will say this: I have never yet heard anyone come out with this line:

"Yeah, well I didn't really feel the crowd was behind me tonight. Y'know they were a bit quiet so I wasn't really motivated, and yeah, bronze was all they got me to tonight."

The crowd is always awesome ok? We know it.

Two kinds of people... (Do-over)

Ok, so, you have a power drill plugged into an extension cord, which is plugged into the wall socket, right? You need to add another extenstion cord cos just one isn't long enough.

Do you add it
(a) at the wall, between the power point and the extension cord, or
(b) between the extension cord and the drill?

A quandry, but maybe a very important psychological indicator.

Good as Gold Mate (Do-over)

"If you calculate the number of medals we win
Per capita of population
Take into account our alphabetical advantage and Australia is the number one Olympic nation.

... But we still can't win like we do at the Commonwealth Games."

Let's look at this mathamatically shall we?

1976 Montreal Did not qualify
1980 Moscow Did not qualify
1984 Los Angeles 5th Position
1988 Seoul 4th Position
1992 Barcelona Did not qualify
1996 Atlanta 3rd - Bronze medal
2000 Sydney 2nd - Silver medal

For all you math geeks out there, discounting the DNQs, yes there is a pattern emerging. Let's see what happens shall we?

2004 Athens 2nd – Silver medal

Dammit Lauren Jackson! The game to prove my mathamatical theories and win the Whatever-You-Win-For-Being-Smart-At-Maths award, and you had to go to sleep.
On the upside, props to Belinda Snell and the rest of the them, who really did quite a good job in their role as "Lauren Jackson's Opals".

And so, in the lead-up to Melbourne 2006, All I ask is this: everyone, please, do not fail to win the gold.

That's it. One task.
Got it?

Morelli vs Ranger (Do-over)

How to choose?

Well, on the one hand, you have a cop, with a house, a dog, but no cookie jar. And on the other, a bounty hunter-slash-mercenary-slash-Batman with an apartment, a Porsche, and shower gel to die for.

"There's another option right?"

Well, yes Seth, you could have a dozen boston cremes and a firebombed/exploded car.

You see the dilemma?

Slight Relief

Now I'm thinking.

Searching for my old name brought up a list of posts. Alas, I couldn't access any of them, but the search results kindly brought up the first few lines of each, so I should be able to put them up, pretty much as they were.

All is not lost.

Very Bad Button

Ok, so I didn't check. Is that any reason why my entire life's work (ok, the last month) has completely, utterly, disappeared from cyberspace?

On a different, yet related note, is there any explicable reason why I should feel such a loss for something that really, was nothing more than an arrangement of letters on a screen? Not really, and yet...

Back to square one.